How to Engage and Flow in your Communication with a Woman

man talking to a woman

“Communication is like dancing a waltz: one leads and the other follows. The communication  flows effortlessly”.

In one of my seminars a man told me, “I have been going out on dates with women, but it seems that the communication doesn’t go anywhere.”

I advised men that if they want to power up their masculine energy, they should take charge and lead when they communicate with women.  Here are two examples I have experienced with men:

Example 1 (I was at the gym, and “Mr. O” approached me.)
Mr O:  Hello, how are you?
Me:  I am doing well, thanks for asking. How are you?
Mr O:  Good! I always see you working out. You inspire me.
Me: I take that as a compliment, thank you!
Mr O:  Nice talking to you. Have a good workout.
Me:  Thanks, you too.

Example 2 (I arrived at a Singles event, when “Mr. B” spotted me and walked toward me to introduce himself.)
Mr B:  I am Mr B., and you are?
Me:  I am Marcia, pleasure meeting you.
Mr B:  I hear you have a cute accent. Where are you from?
Me:  Thanks for the compliment! I am from Ecuador.
Mr B:  People from Ecuador are very friendly, and it is a beautiful country.
Me:  Yes, we are friendly people. Have you been to Ecuador?
Mr B:  No, but I have read about it, seen pictures, and I have good friends from Ecuador.

The conversation with Mr. O didn’t go anywhere. He never asked me personal or specific questions. However, the conversation with Mr. B continued and flowed easily, and we had the opportunity to get to know about each other. He kept leading the conversation and asking me personal questions. We ended up going out a few times.
Men remember, if you are interested in a romantic relationship with a woman, take charge of leading the conversation. Ask specific questions you want to know about the woman, such as, “Did you do anything fun over the weekend?”  (not “How was your weekend?”) and engage her in the conversation.



7 Facts About Women

Couple giving two young children piggyback rides smiling
1.  Desire status and family
2.  Need her problems to be hear
woman -reading-talking-working
3.   Multitask
woman being cherished
4.  Require to be cherished
5.  Learn experientially
6. Fall in love with their ears
Woman doesn's know what she wants
7.  Find out what they want knowing
what they don’t want

7 Facts About Men

1.  Want to conquer, gain power and success
man fixing a car
2.  Solve problems
Man-power- control
3.  Focus in one result at the time
respect _admiration
4.  Want to be respected
5.  Learn logically
Man falling in love
6.  Fall in love with their eyes
7.  Want specifically

Common Mistakes Women Make That Wound Men’s Sensitive Pride

Woman critizing a man

Men are sensitive beings who require as much validation as women. Avoid damaging comments that wounds his pride.

  1. Criticizing his weaknesses
  2. Speaking angrily when he fails in a masculine area of responsibility
  3. Disagreeing with him on masculine matters
  4. Pouring cold water in his ideas
  5. Giving him advise when he has not ask for it
  6. Discussing his career or occupation as if you know as much about it as he does
  7. Reminding him you make more money than he does
  8. Admiring a masculine quality in another man
  9. Suggesting he call a repair man when he is trying to repair something
  10. Not paying attention when he is telling you about something of which he is proud
  11. Not praising him when he does something outstandingly well
  12. Telling him he is losing his figure or his hair
  13. Holding yourself up as an example for him to follow
  14. Reminding him of your superior education



Have You Ever Been Misunderstood by Your Partner?



How many times have you gotten frustrated with your man, because he doesn’t understand what you want.  You get impatient and emotional.

Here some tips that will help you to communicate effectively and ask for what you want:

  1. Get clear on what you want to ask.  Women find out what they want by knowing what they don’t want.
  2. Be direct and ask for what you want. He might say yes or no to your request.
  3. Listen to his response. He will be more connected to you when you are listening.
  4. Don’t react to an answer you don’t want to hear.
  5. Negotiate with words until you both agree to something mutually beneficial.
  6. State how you feel about the decision or solution. “I feel sad because”… or “I feel happy because …”

Remember, communication is very important in a relationship.  It helps by creating a connection between partners. It enables you to share ideas, interests, support each other and negotiate each other’s wants and needs. Good communication actually helps in building a proper understanding in the relationship.

4 Reasons Why Men Pull Away From Women

Why-men-pull-awayI interviewed about 20 men, single and married. I asked them what it is that they want more from their partners. Their answer was “space.” Why? Because they felt suffocated by their partners.

According to the experts, it is common for a man to pull away after being deeply connected to a woman. This is actually healthy. The space allows him to reconnect with himself.  So, the more space he has to pull away, the faster he can bounce back, and the more excited and ready he can be to spend time with his partner.

Here the reasons men pull away:

  1. Men need to regain their sense of self with the “me” state.
  2. Men need to re-energized
  3. Men desire autonomy and independence. This is part of what makes them men!
  4. Men need time to process their feelings when they are falling in love with a woman

Remember, a man is likely to approach you, ready for more love, if you can respect his “time away.”


Online Dating Etiquette for Men

man_online dating

Being single and exposed to online dating, I have experienced some awkward situations. These experiences inspired me to share some suggestions that will help men  have a better connection with women.

Dating Profile
Be honest in your profile about who you are, your age, and what kind of relationship you are looking for.  Are you looking for a woman to have a committed relationship with, or just to play?

Photos are powerful, and first impressions count! You can have as many as you want, but have at least one good current close-up picture as your primary image.

When sending a message to the woman you are interested in, introduce yourself and be direct. Say hello and compliment her on whatever you are attracted to about her.  Let her know you are interested in getting to know more about her because you have read her profile and have things in common…..etc. Invite her to read your profile.  Avoid using  short phrases like, “Hello!  How is your day going?” or  “I like you! Hi”!  Using these phrases sounds as if you are not serious in connecting with a woman.

When you get a response back from her, don’t spend too much time emailing back and forth.  Ask her for her phone number to talk to her. This will help you determine whether there is a connection between you, or not. Without a phone conversation early on, you may start to fall for someone who is really not a match for you, and you both will be disappointed and feel you’ve wasted your time.

Call Her
If you have asked for the phone number, CALL HER (keeping your promise to call shows what kind of person you are).  This is your opportunity to connect and find out more about her. Do you feel the chemistry in your energy exchange? Ask her for a date and what her availability is.

Choose the place you want to meet with her
Be in charge of choosing a public place to meet with her, as long as she is comfortable with that.  If something should require you to cancel the date, call her and let her know in advance. Re-schedule the date.  Be on time; it shows consideration for her and her time.

Enjoy your Date
If there is a chemistry connection between you and you want to see her again, let her know during, or at the end of the date. If no connection is felt, be honest and tell her it was a pleasure meeting her, but you are not experiencing the match you are looking for.

Say good-bye
Regardless of the outcome, walk her to the car, or make sure she gets safely to her car. This shows you are a gentleman.

Online Dating Etiquette for the Feminine Energy Women

woman-online-datingDating can be frustrating ladies! Here are some suggestions that will help you to make the most of it. Remember that online dating is an opportunity to connect with someone and, hopefully, find love.

1. Dating Profile

Write in your profile the exact kind of relationship you are looking for. Mention at the beginning of your profile your feminine qualities, such as playful, affectionate, receptive, fun, etc. You might want to mention your achievements at the end, but in a subtle way. Masculine men want to find a woman to complement them, not to compete with them.

2. Photos

Images tell who you are. Post at least one good, close-up, and current picture. Show pictures in which you are happy and smiling. Full body images are great, especially wearing a dress. Men are visual. They sometimes don’t even read your profile, but they are drawn to your beautiful pictures.

3. Flirting

Online flirting is letting men know you are interested, but without you doing the chase. Wink or favorite the man you want to connect with. If there is not a response from your wink, MOVE on. Do not persist.

4. Message Replying

When receiving messages, always take the time to thank men for their emails and compliments. Men always appreciate that. Engage with them, answer their questions, and flow with the conversation; do not take over.

5. Connection

If there is an interest, a man usually asks you for your phone number. Don’t give it away until you’ve been asked. If he gives you his phone number, reply back to him with your phone number and a note saying that you would love to learn more about him and he is free to call you. He might, or might not call you. Wait!

6. Don’t take things personally

When you are online, you’re exposing yourself. You might receive emails from all kinds of men, older or younger than you. You might get frustrated, but remember that most men don’t read the profiles. They are drawn for the beautiful pictures. They are going to take a risk on you anyway. Be considerate and simply say no thanks, if you’re not interested.

7. Date scheduling

Usually a man will ask you for your availability and time. Let him choose the place you are going to meet. Men are usually considerate and will arrange meet you in a public place. Be yourself, have fun, and display your femininity.

How to Set Standards when Dating Men

Woman-setting-standardsDating involves taking  risks in getting to know someone. Sometimes it can be frustrating and disappointing because a man’s  actions don’t match his words or commitments.

It is important you set high standards with a man at the beginning of the relationship. Communicate clearly and directly what you are not comfortable with. This shows the man you have self-worth.

A confident woman will set high standards in a calm way .

Example: A man asks you for a date, and he doesn’t shows up. He excuses himself later. Be direct and tell him that he has the right not to show up; however, you don’t appreciate this kind of behavior, and if it  happens again you will leave if he has not arrived by 15 minutes after the agreed time. If  he doesn’t show up at all,  you  should not be available for him anymore. If the man is really interested in you, this disrespectful behavior will stop.

Also, texting seems to be norm nowadays. In my opinion texting can lead to misunderstandings. If the man you’re dating only reaches out to you via text, he doesn’t want to get emotionally involve with you. Let him know you are not comfortable with texting when getting to know someone, so you will not be answering his text messages. Tell him that you are more comfortable talking on the phone with him  or emailing him. This is a more personal approach. Use texting for quick and short interactions only. Then, keep your word and do not engage in the texting. If you do,  he knows he can get away with it, and your action will not match your words.

When you  tolerate such behaviors from a man you are dating, you end up building up resentment and feeling frustrated and you will probably close your heart. Don’t do it.  Instead, speak up,  and you will attract a gentleman that will respect you for it.

Remember that setting standards shows that you are a person of integrity.

6 Things That Men Want In A Woman

happy cauple

1. Acknowledgement of his efforts

When she acknowledges her man in some small way for his efforts, it melts his heart and makes him want to do more things for her. He wants to make her happy.

2. A strong sense of respect

To a man, respect means being treated by her as though she thinks highly of him. He wants to feel as if she looks to him as a hero, protector, leader, capable, competent, and reliable provider.

3. Support

A man wants a woman who is on his side, supporting him without any judgments. When he feels supported he will succeed and accomplished anything. He wants to be the best man he can be.

4. Space “Alone time”

A man has a strong desire for autonomy and independence. This is part of what makes him a man.  He doesn’t want her to resent him when he asks for space. The space allows him to come back to his sense of self, so he can reengage with her in a solid way. This also will strengthen the relationship.

5. A confident woman

A man wants a confident woman with her own sense of purpose, a woman who has her own life and interests that she enjoys, with or without him.  She knows that they will come together to enhance each other’s lives.

6. Physical affection both sexual and nonsexual

A man wants a physical connection with a woman, such as touching, hand-holding, kissing, walking arm in arm, or her head resting on his shoulder.  These make him feel like he’s one with her, and protecting her from harm. He also wants sex, which helps move him into a deeper connection with all of his emotional wants and needs.


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