Archive for the 'Direct communication' Category

How to Set Standards when Dating Men

Woman-setting-standardsDating involves taking  risks in getting to know someone. Sometimes it can be frustrating and disappointing because a man’s  actions don’t match his words or commitments.

It is important you set high standards with a man at the beginning of the relationship. Communicate clearly and directly what you are not comfortable with. This shows the man you have self-worth.

A confident woman will set high standards in a calm way .

Example: A man asks you for a date, and he doesn’t shows up. He excuses himself later. Be direct and tell him that he has the right not to show up; however, you don’t appreciate this kind of behavior, and if it  happens again you will leave if he has not arrived by 15 minutes after the agreed time. If  he doesn’t show up at all,  you  should not be available for him anymore. If the man is really interested in you, this disrespectful behavior will stop.

Also, texting seems to be norm nowadays. In my opinion texting can lead to misunderstandings. If the man you’re dating only reaches out to you via text, he doesn’t want to get emotionally involve with you. Let him know you are not comfortable with texting when getting to know someone, so you will not be answering his text messages. Tell him that you are more comfortable talking on the phone with him  or emailing him. This is a more personal approach. Use texting for quick and short interactions only. Then, keep your word and do not engage in the texting. If you do,  he knows he can get away with it, and your action will not match your words.

When you  tolerate such behaviors from a man you are dating, you end up building up resentment and feeling frustrated and you will probably close your heart. Don’t do it.  Instead, speak up,  and you will attract a gentleman that will respect you for it.

Remember that setting standards shows that you are a person of integrity.


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